Every LHC start and stop since 2008, tested against 8,500+ of James's calendar events.
Run 3 ended June 27, 2026 at 05:52 — final beams dumped, four years of silence ahead. Does the machine move a life 9,000 km away? We ran the numbers honestly: ±30 and ±60-day windows, z-scores, control dates, all twenty machine transitions. Short answer below. Great coincidences first.
The scan's greatest hits — real events from your calendar landing uncannily close to machine milestones. Tap a card for the full story and the evidence.
Eighteen years of beams and shutdowns — all twenty start/stop dates, clickable. Solid pills have calendar data; dashed pills predate the calendar (the 2008–2010 machine era found it empty — airtight alibi). Pick a date and see what life was doing while the magnets ramped.
Same anomaly scan, five arbitrary dates with zero LHC significance. If random Tuesdays light up like beam days, the collider walks free. (They do. It does.) Bars show ±30-day event density vs your yearly baseline — purple is LHC, gray is control.
LS3 runs to 2030: 1.2 km of new magnets, and every experiment rebuilding for 140–200 simultaneous collisions per bunch crossing — up from ~60.
*confound: winter. The LHC and a Portland agency share a season, not a cause.